*You stroll around Downtown, an old man comes to you yelling something incoherently, and gives you a piece of paper, which reads:
(http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2015/08/06/15/2B24842900000578-3187048-image-m-66_1438869931993.jpg)(http://thebeerbarrel.net/smilies/nigburn.gif)(http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2011/08/09/article-2024203-0D5ECF0100000578-921_470x423.jpg)
NORTH POINT MALL'S TOOLSHOP IS HAVING A CRAZY FIRE SALE
The North Point Mall's tooled Up is selling ALL OF ITS TOOLS! For PRACTICLY NOTHING! It has lowered its prices to be the lowest in Vice City*!
LIMITED TIME OFFER!!! GRAB IT WHILE ITS HOT!
Our Menu:
- Harpoon for 140 ARD - Hookshots!
- Katana for 136 ARD - These replicas were delivered to us for LARP purposes, we don't know why the arrived, this isn't even a tool, but we just sharpened them like crazy and now we are selling them anyways!
- Chainsaw for 580 ARD - The cheapest in the city*!!!!!
- Screwdriver for 25 ARD - With this in your hand you'll wanna screw everything in sight you'll be questioning your sexuality!
- Hammer for 30 ARD - Good heavens would you look at the time.. ITS TIME TO BUY FROM OUR SHOP!
(https://thoughtcatalog.files.wordpress.com/2011/01/vietnamese_buddhist_monk_1963_622.jpg?w=622&h=403)(https://www.northwesternflipside.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/man-on-fire.jpg)
So why not get wood and do it yourself this weekend? ITS GONNA GET LIT!
Please note there isn't really a fire in the store, its safe to go there.
ANYONE WHO COMMENTS ON THIS THREAD GETS ANOTHER 5% DISCOUNT! AHHHHH!
*THERES NO CATCH! ITS LITERALLY THE CHEAPEST THIS TIME!
(http://s3.amazonaws.com/pix.iemoji.com/images/emoji/apple/ios-11/256/fire.png)(https://img-comment-fun.9cache.com/media/0e8ea94a145638837250256743_700w_0.jpg)