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Argonath RPG Community => Speakerbox => Topic started by: Aksel on June 17, 2010, 11:44:19 pm

Title: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: Aksel on June 17, 2010, 11:44:19 pm
Quote
A man has died after an eel that was inserted into his rectum gnawed away at his bowels, causing agonising injuries which were eventually fatal.

The 59-year-old man, a chef, was reportedly taken to a Sichuan hospital complaining of abdominal pain, dehydration and a great deal of anal bleeding. He was soon diagnosed as being in a severe state of shock.

Doctors were mystified as to the cause, and obtained permission from his family to undertake an exploratory laparotomy. Cutting open his innards, they discovered a 50cm long Asian swamp eel lodged in his rectum.

Though dead, the eel had apparently already wrought havoc on his innards, biting its way through his intestines prior to dying. Internal bleeding and infection rapidly set in.

He was reported to have eaten a lot of eel the previous day, but otherwise doctors had no idea how the creature had got there. His condition quickly worsened.

He lingered for 10 days in intensive care but eventually succumbed to the injuries and sepsis.

The likely cause was eventually established - he had apparently been drinking with friends, and had passed out. His friends had decided it would be amusing to insert a live eel into his anus whilst he was comatose.

Police have reportedly begun an investigation.

LMAO.
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: Traser on June 17, 2010, 11:55:52 pm
LMAO.

Nice friends..
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: Hidduh on June 18, 2010, 12:13:12 am
Ouch.. :neutral:
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: BlueFox on June 18, 2010, 06:28:22 am
wheres Sichuan?
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: tiderman on June 18, 2010, 12:11:55 pm
Man, I would've been so pissed. This is why I don't drink alcohol.
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: EminemRulez on June 18, 2010, 12:24:57 pm
They aren't normal, seriously...
They could've shoved a whatever at his ass, but an eel?
Take those 'friends' to the hospital...
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: tiderman on June 18, 2010, 01:13:11 pm
They aren't normal, seriously...
They could've shoved a whatever at his ass, but an eel?
Take those 'friends' to the hospital...
If you had the chance to insert an eel into a good friends rectum, wouldn't you do it?
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: Brad. on June 18, 2010, 01:19:20 pm
Alarming.... but Hilarious.
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: Aksel on June 18, 2010, 01:40:01 pm
wheres Sichuan?

China, I think.
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: MrFrancis on June 18, 2010, 01:47:21 pm
Unbelievable. I feel sorry for the old chap....  :(
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: Alarba on June 18, 2010, 01:51:17 pm
Nowday ppl insert fishes up unconcious friends ass.......
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: Maxy on June 18, 2010, 10:20:45 pm
If you had the chance to insert an eel into a good friends rectum, wouldn't you do it?


Well, that goes without saying.
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: tiderman on June 18, 2010, 11:03:45 pm
Nowday ppl insert fishes up unconcious friends ass.......
God. Would you stop being so immature and obscene? Jesus, man...
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: Pandalink on June 18, 2010, 11:17:59 pm
sigh
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: Maxy on June 19, 2010, 10:42:40 pm
God.

Would you stop being so immature and obscene?

Jesus, man...


Subliminal Blasphemy.
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: Traser on June 19, 2010, 10:46:12 pm
God. Would you stop being so immature and obscene? Jesus, man...

Well he is right, He is Sarcastic.. and i know what he means.. where does the majority of the teenage things go..
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: Alsatian on June 19, 2010, 10:49:36 pm
What a way to die...
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: AlexStruck on June 20, 2010, 02:36:50 pm
Ouch   :tomato:
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: Altair_Carter on June 20, 2010, 06:14:09 pm
Next:

A fish in Sichuan dies after friends insert human up his arse as a joke
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: Jserg on June 21, 2010, 12:00:44 am
Next:

A fish in Sichuan dies after friends insert human up his arse as a joke

Ahahah Epic.
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: Grovyle on June 21, 2010, 03:32:24 pm
Next:

A fish in Sichuan dies after friends insert human up his arse as a joke

Very strong Soviet Russia joke look-alike detected.
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: Altair_Carter on June 21, 2010, 03:36:10 pm
Very strong Soviet Russia joke look-alike detected.
IN SOVIET RUSSIA
JOKE LOOK-ALIKE DETECT VERY STRONG SOVIET RUSSIA
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: Grovyle on June 21, 2010, 03:42:13 pm
IN SOVIET RUSSIA
JOKE LOOK-ALIKE DETECT VERY STRONG SOVIET RUSSIA

*head explodes*
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: MisterSjeiks on June 21, 2010, 08:56:44 pm
O.O
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: Alarba on June 21, 2010, 11:39:54 pm
God. Would you stop being so immature and obscene? Jesus, man...
If you had the chance to insert an eel into a good friends rectum, wouldn't you do it?
Hmmmmm..... interesting .......
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: Grovyle on June 22, 2010, 01:01:34 am
Hmmmmm..... interesting .......

Sense of humour is not always directed to (im)maturity.
Title: Re: Man in Sichuan dies after friends insert eel up his arse as a joke
Post by: Trobby888 on June 22, 2010, 08:38:25 am
Well, it goes without saying.. The biggest mistake this guy made was to accept them as his "friends".

 :ps: Yes, Sichuan is a city in China. It's the place that suffered the massive earthquake in 2008 and was broadcasted worldly.
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