Argonath RPG - A World of its own

Argonath RPG Community => Speakerbox => Topic started by: schfifty on August 26, 2007, 05:48:35 am

Title: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: schfifty on August 26, 2007, 05:48:35 am
Post your jokes here!!!
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Sirricharic on August 26, 2007, 07:01:23 am
i got one Yo mama so ugly when she look out the window she get a ticket for disturbing the peace
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: tiderman on August 26, 2007, 09:06:34 am
i got one Yo mama so ugly when she look out the window she get a ticket for disturbing the peace
LOOOOL :lol: Yo mama...
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: {DB}Satan on August 26, 2007, 01:17:40 pm
This is CRAZY joke and actually i don't want to remember it, but when i and my friend were few years younger, my friend spitted accidently straight into my mouth and it was like........ :conf:
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Jnn on August 26, 2007, 01:29:13 pm
when i was a newbie in mta..

Jnn = Jealous Naked Niggas



I hate you -_-
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Dave on August 26, 2007, 01:39:03 pm
ur mum's so fat she walked infront of the TV and u missed 30 episodes of ur favourite TV show :D
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Abraham on August 26, 2007, 02:54:55 pm
yo mama's skinny.
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Luca_Scalise on August 26, 2007, 03:11:37 pm
Yo mama is so fat when she goes on the bus the driver gives her 5 tickets
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Carhartt on August 26, 2007, 03:13:16 pm
Yo mama is so fat when she goes on the bus the driver gives her 5 tickets
lmfao   :lol: :rofl: :lol:
That made me laughing
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: schfifty on August 26, 2007, 03:34:43 pm
yo mama is so ugly she fell of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: tiderman on August 26, 2007, 03:44:07 pm
This is CRAZY joke and actually i don't want to remember it, but when i and my friend were few years younger, my friend spitted accidently straight into my mouth and it was like........ :conf:
orgasmic? :lol:

yo mama is so ugly she fell of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down
hahahah that was a bad ass joke  :lol: So bad it made me laugh

Yo mama is so fat when she goes on the bus the driver gives her 5 tickets
LMAO

yo mama's skinny.
LOL!!!
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Fred Pepper on August 26, 2007, 06:07:32 pm
Yo mama so fat when she went into an ugly contest the judge said no professionals...
Yo mama so fat when she has wants someone to shake her hand, she has to give directions
Yo mama so fat she goes to a restaurant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"
Yo mama so fat she was baptised in the ocean
Yo mama so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please"
Yo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it


lolz
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Neave on August 26, 2007, 06:14:00 pm
Yo mama so fat when she went into an ugly contest the judge said no professionals...
Yo mama so fat when she has wants someone to shake her hand, she has to give directions
Yo mama so fat she goes to a restaurant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"
Yo mama so fat she was baptised in the ocean
Yo mama so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please"
Yo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it


lolz


 :lol: :lol:
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Justin on August 26, 2007, 06:54:28 pm
Yo mama so fat when she went into an ugly contest the judge said no professionals...

Lmao!!!  :lol:
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Chill on August 26, 2007, 07:05:11 pm
yo mama's skinny.
That was the only joke in this thread ive laughed at xD.
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Justin on August 26, 2007, 08:48:33 pm
Yo mama so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up

Yo mama so fat her nickname is "Lardo"

Yo mama so fat she eats Wheat Thicks.

Yo mama so fat were in her right now

Yo mama so fat people jog around her for exercise

Yo mama so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone

Yo mama so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors

Yo mamma so fat you haveta roll over twice to get off her...

Yo mama so fat she was floating in the ocean and spain claimed her for then new world

Yo mama so fat she lay on the beach and people run around yelling Free Willy

Yo mama so fat when you get on top of her your ears pop!

Yo mama so fat when she has wants someone to shake her hand, she has to give directions!

Yo mama so fat she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"

Yo mama so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat, people said "Taxi!"

Yo mama so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized

Yo mama so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway

Yo mama so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller

Yo mama so fat she got to pull down her pants to get into her pockets

Yo mama so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave, she landed on 12th

Yo mama so fat when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too

Yo mama so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn"

Yo mama so fat when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE!

Yo mama so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please"

Yo mama so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.

Yo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it.

Yo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.

Yo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says we don't do livestock.

Yo mama so fat her neck looks like a pair of hot dogs!

Yo mama so fat she's got her own area code!

Yo mama so fat she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagon!

Yo mama so fat God couldn't light Earth until she moved!

Yo mama so fat NASA has to orbit a satellite around her!

Yo mama so fat whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in!

Yo mama so fat when she plays hopscotch, she goes New York, L.A., Chicago...

Yo mama so fat she's got Amtrak written on her leg.

Yo mama so fat even Bill Gates couldn't pay for her liposuction!

Yo mama so fat her legs is like spoiled milk - white & chunky!

Yo mama so fat I had to take a train and two buses just to get on the her good side!

Yo mama so fat she wakes up in sections!

Yo mama so fat when she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride HER!

Yo mama so fat she sat on a quarter and a booger shot out of george washington's nose.

Yo mama so fat she rolled over 4 quarters and it made a dollar!

Yo mama so fat when she lies on the beach no one else gets sun!

Yo mama so fat when she bunje jumps she goes straight to hell!

Yo mama so fat when she jumps up in the air she gets stuck!!!

Yo mama so fat she's got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book!

Yo mama so fat that her senior pictures had to be arial views!

Yo mama so fat she's on both sides of the family!

Yo mama so fat everytime she walks in high heels, she strikes oil!

Yo mama so fat she fell and made the Grand Canyon!

Yo mama so fat she sat on the beach and Greenpeace threw her in!

Yo mama so fat even her clothes have stretch marks!

Yo mama so fat she has a wooden leg with a kickstand!

Yo mama so fat she has to use a VCR as a beeper!

Yo mama so fat she broke her leg, and gravy poured out!

Yo mama so fat when she rides in a hot air balloon, it looks like she's wearin tights!

Yo mama so fat she got hit by a parked car!

Yo mama so fat they have to grease the bath tub to get her out!

Yo mama so fat she has a run in her blue-jeans!

Yo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.

Yo mama so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat people say "Taxi!"

Yo mama so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway!

Yo mama so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller!

Yo mama so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave she landed on 12th

Yo mama so fat when she bungee jumps she pulls down the bridge too

Yo mama so fat she steps on a scale & it goes one at a time please

Yo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it!

Yo mama so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck!

Yo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it.

Yo mama so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.

Yo mama so fat they use the elastic in her underwear for bungee jumping

Yo mama so fat when they used her underwear elastic for bungee jumping, they hit the ground.

Yo mama so fat when she back up she beep.

Yo mama so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck.

Yo mama so fat she has to buy two airline tickets.

Yo mama so fat when she fell over she rocked herself asleep trying to get up again.

Yo mama so fat she influences the tides.

Yo mama so fat that when I tried to drive around her I ran out of gas.

Yo mama so fat she broke her leg and gravy fell out.

Yo mama so fat the animals at the zoo feed her.

Yo mama so fat she was baptized at Marine World.

Yo mama so fat she's on both sides of the family!

Yo mama so fat when she dances at a concert the whole band skips.

Yo mama so fat the Aids quilt wouldn't cover her

Yo mama so fat she stands in two time zones.

Yo mama so fat I tried to drive around her and I ran out of gas.

Yo mama so fat she left the house in high heels and when she came back she had on flip flops.

Yo mama so fat shes on both sides of the family

Yo mama so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through

Yo mama so fat when she goes to an all you can eat buffet, they have to install speed bumps.

Yo mama so fat that she cant tie her own shoes.

Yo mama so fat sets off car alarms when she runs.

Yo mama so fat she cant reach her back pocket.

Yo mama so fat when she wears one of those X jackets, helicopters try to land on her back!

Yo mama so fat her college graduation picture was an airial.

Yo mama so fat she lays on the beach and greenpeace tried to push her back in the water

Yo mama so fat she broke her leg and gravy poured out

Yo mama so fat she uses redwoods to pick her teeth

Yo mama so fat the only pictures you have of her are satellite pictures

Yo mama so fat she jumped in the air and got stuck.

Yo mama so fat she put on some BVD's and by the time they reached her waist they spelled out boulevard.

Yo mama so fat she sat on a dollar and squeezed a booger out George Washington's nose.

Yo mama so fat she stepped on a rainbow and made Skittles.

Yo mama so fat she uses a mattress for a tampon.

Yo mama so fat that when she sits on the beach, Greenpeace shows up and tries to tow her back into the ocean.....

Yo mama so fat that she would have been in E.T., but when she rode the bike across the moon, she caused an eclipse.

Yo mama so fat she hoola-hooped the super bowl.

Yo mama so fat she was baptised in the ocean.

Yo mama so fat she has to iron her clothes in the driveway.

Yo mama so fat they tie a rope around her shoulders and drag her through a tunnel when they want to clean it.

Yo mama so fat when she got hit by a bus, she said, "Who threw that rock?"

Yo mama so fat when she stands in a left-turn lane it gives her the green arrow!

Yo mama so fat that when whe was born, she gave the hospital stretch marks.

Yo mama so fat we went to the drive-in and didn't have to pay because we dressed her as a Chevrolet.



Thank you google :)
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: tiderman on August 26, 2007, 08:56:12 pm
Yo mama so fat she fell and made the Grand Canyon!

Yo mama so fat she sat on the beach and Greenpeace threw her in!
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Jcstodds on August 26, 2007, 09:02:58 pm
Yo' mum's so fat she has smaller fat women orbiting her.  ~Simon Cowell
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Luca_Scalise on August 27, 2007, 12:49:53 am
Yo mama on 14th april 1912 was swimming in the atlantic ocean...
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: T r o j a n TM on August 27, 2007, 01:39:07 am
What did the big chimney say to the little chimney?

YOU'RE TO YOUNG TO SMOKE. :cool:

 :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Watti on August 27, 2007, 02:10:33 am
Quote
I met a guy with 5 Penis' and i asked how his pants fit and he said, Like a glove
Quote
What do you call a Guy with no legs no arms in the middle of the Ocean

Bob

Quote
What do you call that same guy on your door step

Matt
Quote
What do you call a girl with one leg

Ilean

Quote
What do you call a girl with 2 legs

Nolean

Quote
What do you call a guy with 1000 Rabbits shoved up his ass

Warren

Quote
What do you call a girl that can strech the length of a Tennis court

Anet

Quote
What is the difference between a White baby and a black Baby

30 seconds in a microwave
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Abraham on August 27, 2007, 07:31:58 am
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7_rBidCkJxo
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Australia on August 27, 2007, 09:58:09 am
Ya Mama so fat she uses king-size matresses for tampons.
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Fred Pepper on August 27, 2007, 11:28:53 pm
What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? :D












A stick! (My oldest one lolz)
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Abraham on August 29, 2007, 06:18:13 pm
Make war, not love.

There are no condoms on GTA.
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Sirricharic on August 29, 2007, 10:21:16 pm
Yo mama so stupid she triped over a cordless phone

Yo mama so fat not even jeseus christ can lift ser spirit

Yo mama so stupid she thought a quarterback was a refund

Yo mama so ugly when she went on the news they said no intervies on holocost

Yo mama so stupid she sold her car for gas money

Yo mama so dirty she made Speed Stick Slow down

Yo mama so poor i saw her kicking a can she said she was moving

Yo mama so skinny she can dogne raindrops

Yo mama so short she has to swing her legs over the curb

Yo mama so fat she jumped in the ocean and the water came out and said ill wait my turn

Yo mama so old she farsts dust and breastfeeds powder

Yo mama so old she used to gangbang with the flintstones

and the last one

Yo mama so old she went to Gandalfs mom baby shower   :lol:
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Aragorn on August 30, 2007, 02:02:11 pm
Real life joke... Hope, it will train your brain...)))

The Russian immigrants' children made a joke at American school...
They pushed into the school three pigs...
That is nothing, but... They drew a numbers on pigs' backs - 1, 2 and... 4...
The whole week American police was busy...
Guess why...
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Watti on August 30, 2007, 02:10:50 pm
hmmmm..... this is good :P

ummmers... lets see now... i think its

Looking for the number that is between 2 and 3 but it cant be Cause 6 is afraid of 7 cause 7 8 9

but it might be...

Fixing the World Trade Center Accident

BTW here is true story...ish... in Wattinesia

The Pilots for September 11 Attacks were Intoxicated with 58 % Blood level... (low in Wattinesia)

but the Terrorist thought hey look N20 so he Busted it.. And it blew up the Electircal system.. and cause the Pilot was Intoxicated.. he was sleeping.. the co-pilot was Driving... and of cos NY has Fog.. Lots of it.. at 5 AM or what ever
then like mountains.. COuldnt see them... KABOOOM!!!!

Except for the other plane... the Co-Pilot and the Pilot and the terror man was having an Orgy....
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Sirricharic on August 30, 2007, 10:27:32 pm
Real life joke... Hope, it will train your brain...)))

The Russian immigrants' children made a joke at American school...
They pushed into the school three pigs...
That is nothing, but... They drew a numbers on pigs' backs - 1, 2 and... 4...
The whole week American police was busy...
Guess why...

Because cops are pigs and they were getting numbers on their back?
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: [Rstar]Razor on August 30, 2007, 11:13:59 pm
You mama is so FAAT and BIIG that even a Sniper +5000 Miles far never Misses the shot.
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: RiX[LV] on August 31, 2007, 04:29:19 am
Real life joke... Hope, it will train your brain...)))

The Russian immigrants' children made a joke at American school...
They pushed into the school three pigs...
That is nothing, but... They drew a numbers on pigs' backs - 1, 2 and... 4...
The whole week American police was busy...
Guess why...
Because cops was searching for 3th pig all day...

 :ps: about other players, move your brain ^_^
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: schfifty on August 31, 2007, 07:05:06 am
OK, does ne1 have ne Chuck Norris jokes? Don't worry Europeans might not understand.
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: {DB}Satan on August 31, 2007, 09:34:48 am
Yo mama is so fat, that she lives in the garden.

Yo mama is so fat, that she rolls instead of walking :D
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Arto on August 31, 2007, 08:18:08 pm
Chuck Norris feel no fear,fear feels Chuck Norris :)
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Gimli on August 31, 2007, 08:26:10 pm
OK, does ne1 have ne Chuck Norris jokes? Don't worry Europeans might not understand.


Lool, Chuck Norris jokes are popular here as well. I think they're a bit stupid though  :redface:
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: [LCV]stone on August 31, 2007, 11:08:02 pm
my dad went to a pakistani's party
he said the music was ok 
he also said musical chairs was very fun
but he said wen it came too pass the parcel...
...that finished pretty fast

Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Blingtoaswing on September 01, 2007, 01:57:54 pm
Yo mama is so fat, that she rolls instead of walking :D

Haha, I have a big friend and our joke is 'YEAH YOU ROLL AWAY'
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: [Rstar]Razor on September 01, 2007, 02:58:57 pm
Yo mama so stupid that she teaches people how to be stupid (People are already Stupid  :lol: )
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: {DB}Satan on September 01, 2007, 05:55:42 pm
Yo mama doesnt exist.
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Abraham on September 01, 2007, 06:12:39 pm
Seriously people, check this video and listen. word up.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7_rBidCkJxo
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: [Rstar]Razor on September 01, 2007, 06:56:50 pm
hahaha NEVA  :lol:
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: schfifty on September 01, 2007, 07:12:40 pm
haha I have a Chuck Norris joke!


Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer...it's too bad he NEVER cries
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: {DB}Satan on September 02, 2007, 09:25:48 am
Seriously people, check this video and listen. word up.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7_rBidCkJxo
Old school :D
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Radagast on September 02, 2007, 02:44:02 pm
An Englishman, an Irishman, a Scotsman and 4 arabs and 5 Poles walked into a bar with a Priest, a Vicar and a Rabbi and the bartender said "This has GOT to be a joke!"

:s
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Sirricharic on September 02, 2007, 08:16:12 pm
ok there were 3 guys a Black Guy White Guy and a Mexican guy
They all had to make an elephant shake his head yes and shake his head no
If they did they get to marry a princess

The white guy went first and said

"If you shake your head yes and shake it no ill have a mr washington waiting 4 ya eh,?"

The elephaht laughs and kicks the shit out of him

The mexican guy went next

"Eh holmes if you shake you head yes and shake it no ill make u some enchiladas and papuas for a good job"

The elephant took the food and kicked the shit out of him

The black guy went next

"Eh brother if u do this here shake ya head yes and shake it no i wont have to whoop yo ass"

The elephant kicked the hsit out of him and took a shit on him too

Later that night the Black guy got a golf club and a baseball bat and beat the shit out of the elephant

The next morning they tried again the Black guy went first

He said to the elephant "Remember me?" *elephant shakes yes* "Want some more" elephant shakes no*

And the Black guy got jumped by all the elephants homies and died and the Mexican guy Won?


The End


 :ps: Winning isnt everything
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: {DB}Satan on September 02, 2007, 08:36:07 pm
ok there were 3 guys a Black Guy White Guy and a Mexican guy
They all had to make an elephant shake his head yes and shake his head no
If they did they get to marry a princess

The white guy went first and said

"If you shake your head yes and shake it no ill have a mr washington waiting 4 ya eh,?"

The elephaht laughs and kicks the shit out of him

The mexican guy went next

"Eh holmes if you shake you head yes and shake it no ill make u some enchiladas and papuas for a good job"

The elephant took the food and kicked the shit out of him

The black guy went next

"Eh brother if u do this here shake ya head yes and shake it no i wont have to whoop yo ass"

The elephant kicked the hsit out of him and took a shit on him too

Later that night the Black guy got a golf club and a baseball bat and beat the shit out of the elephant

The next morning they tried again the Black guy went first

He said to the elephant "Remember me?" *elephant shakes yes* "Want some more" elephant shakes no*

And the Black guy got jumped by all the elephants homies and died and the Mexican guy Won?


The End

:lol: :lol: :rofl:
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: schfifty on September 06, 2007, 06:44:37 am
I got another...did you hear about the gay midget??? yeah he came out of the cupboard :rofl:
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Hess on September 06, 2007, 08:29:19 am
I got another...did you hear about the gay midget??? yeah he came out of the cupboard :rofl:
I don't get it :(
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Hess on September 06, 2007, 09:50:13 am
what does a black man and sperm have in common? only one in a million work
Racist!!! :mad:
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: lionz on September 06, 2007, 12:26:10 pm
called a "joke" lol not mine my friends, but i got nufin against black people i got heaps of friends, so no need for any of that racist! bullshit...
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: {DB}Satan on September 06, 2007, 05:43:05 pm
Yeah i like actually black people they are funny and cool in many ways but many of them are rappars and gangstas who are our enemies.
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: tiderman on September 06, 2007, 05:46:24 pm
... many of them are rappars and gangstas who are our enemies.
Bill cosby is one of them :(
Title: Re: JOKES (POST EM HERE!!!)
Post by: Wayne on September 06, 2007, 11:29:19 pm
a italian man who went to malta..
one day a italian man decided to travel to malta..
then he wanted a breakfast..
italian: i want 2 pieces of toast
the manager brings one piece of toast
italian: i want 2 piece
manager: go to the toilet
italian: you no understand i want 2 pieces on my plate
manager: you better not piss on the plate you soon of a bitch
italian: i don't know why she called me soon of a beach..
later..
he went to restaurant..
there had spoon and knive but no fock..
italian: i want a fock..
manager: everyone wants fuck..
italian: you no understand i want fock on the table..
manager: you better not fuck on the table you soon of a bitch
later..
he went to the hotel..
and he found no sheets on the bed..
italian: call the manager! tell him i wanna sheet
manager: go to the toilet
italian: you no understand i want sheet on my bed
manager: you better not shit on the bed you soon of a bitch..
them the italian decided to see the manager..
manager: Peace on you.
italian: PISS ON YOU TOO SOON OF A BEACH! I'M GONNA GO BACK TO ITALY.
End
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