CS
You know the make, model, caliber, fireing rate, round wieght, gun wieght, clip size, accuracy, price, and color of every gun in existance.
You can tell what someone is trying to shoot you with by sound alone.
You know that last enemy is down the hall, to the right, hiding in the vent faceing the big door.
You croutch in you everyday life, and your mind thinks CTRL
"Roger That" and "Negative" replace yes and no in your vocabulary
You always check corners when walking....Just in case
You've ever sued a major game development Co. for illegal CD KEY + damages and Mental anguish
You've ever tied a noose because you couldn't find a server.
You consider waiting for a bus camping
If your alarm clock goes off and your dream changes from hostage rescue to bomb defuse
If Your idea of dating is meeting a chick who plays CS
If Your Halloween costume was any CS character
If You've had a verbal argument at DMV because they wont let you use Leetspeak on your personalised plates
If You've tried to figure a budget based on work/CS play hmm if i work 8 hours and play 12 hours i can sleep
You dont know why 9-11 happened when you and two other guys killed 12 Terrorists that took a 747 hostage, and they had guns
Your friend invites you camping and you bring a laptop instead of a tent.
When steam freezes up you write 4 emails to the developers and proceed to mope around the house aimless and lost.
Your desk is covered in soda cans, coffee cups, doritos, and almond joy wrappers left over from a hard days work.
You start gaming at midnight and forget to sleep.
You yell WTF instead of cursing under your breath
You, instead of laughing u feel the urge to scream "LOL"
Someone breaks into your house/car/whatever and steals stuff, you tell the cops it was "hacks".
You wish you had a M3 on the Interstate on your way to work sometimes.
You go to the copy room at work and look left to right in a panning motion to "clear" the room of campers
You maxed out your computers specs to play a 5 year old game.
Anyone who doesn't know what online gaming is, is culturally inept.
The room down the hall knows you as that guy who's always shooting things at 3 in the morning.
The super of your building has threatened you with eviction if you don't turn down that "damn sub woofer."
You own your friends in any FPS because none require even the slightest effort compared to CS.
The outside world = that place you visit when maps are loading.
You lie about what time you "shut down" last night... "What do you mean 3am, I swear I was in bed by midnight!"
You tell time based on map switches.
You press you're mic key when ever you talk to someone ont the computer.-Bishop X
It's not enough to just kill someone you have to knife them in the head (put put cars, soulcollector).
You're possessor wishes it would just melt already.
You press "Y" before typing on ICQ or other IM's (Think of the problems that causes when you "hook up" and you want to ask: "are you nekid?" and you type, "Y r u nekid?")-[XTC]Maltese Falcon
The only time you blink is when you're dead.-[XTC]Maltese Falcon
You know about every glitch in every map and exploit them for personal gain (well if you're a jerk).
Nobody is better than you and if they are they MUST be cheating.
You forgot to feed your dog because you couldn't leave the server before you had a 2:1 kill ratio.
You're not having a good day unless your team is down by 3 people and you still have the highest score on the map.
You're playing paintball in the woods, you get shot in the head from behind and yell "HACKER" -Put Put Cars
You're watching TV, you here a "beep, beep, beep" and you panic and start looking for a defusal kit not realizing it's just the microwave.-Put Put Cars
You hold the highest rank on 6 servers.
your favorite server goes down and people get hurt.
In your society people aren't judged by degree, position, power, or intelligence, only kill ratio.
Head shots are considered erotic.
You regularly bounce grenades off the heads of your opponents.
You can run around facing the ground with and Ak47 and get head shots.
The bumper sticker on you're car reads "Get a life play CS."
To you loading a server is a chore
You mumble RCON commands in your sleep.
You don't do homework due to extreme gaming.
You write a list about how you know when you've been playing too much CS.
You thought "Everything Camping" was a lan house.
Your server bill takes priority to your phone bill.
On vacation in italy you get a sudden sense of dejavu.
A student driver cuts you off and you yell, "Newbie!" out the window.
You have a 5 button optical gaming mouse and you payed 15 bucks for a ratpadz mouse pad, to get that extra edge.
Your true friends know you only by your CS name and WON ID.
Your ass is shaped like the bottom of your chair.
At the office you day dream about what you would do if 4 terrorists, 2 with Ak47s, 1 with a P90, and another with an AWP, came crashing though you're window.
You're skin is so white you look like Michael Jackson.
A letter to you're boss looks something to the effect of, "this is bcuz 4u its not..."
You where on the phone the other day and looking for your talk key
Your walking in the basement of your office building and start looking at ventillation grates for Ts
Your wife asks you to buy groceries and you look for the buy key
When it comes time to pay your bills, you look at the bottom right hand side of your screen to see if you have enough money
The other day when my wife just could not shut up, I told her to stop spamming.
You say rofl, lamo, and lol on a regular basis.
You did your senior thesis on the L337 crew.
You have print outs of CS maps attached to your wall.
Console gamers are considered inferior to you.
You haven't seen you family in 3 years and you still live at home.
You insist you're peers call you "*insert CS name here*."
DSL won't do! you need cable!
Your teammates refer to you as "That guy who wont stop barking orders at the start of a round".
'A' and 'B' aren't letters only markings referring to bomb sites.
You are reading this document.
You don't understand why the war in Afghanistan lasted so long...You take out 734 terrorists a day.
Your honeymoon to the caribbean was a period of withdrawal.
You go to sleep after playing CS, and check under the bed just in case...-Mad Max
You are the founder and a member of CS addicts anonymous.
All you want for Christmas is a radion 9800 Xt 256.
Your computer hasn't been shut down in 4 years.
The last time you're computer crashed you wouldn't leave the internet cafe until the owner dragged you out.
You downloaded a CS desktop them from xtcclan.net
You haven't been outside in so long going to the beach would cook you alive.
You go hunting, your gun gets jammed so u haul out your jack-knife and charge at the moose.
You dial a telephone number, and always end with 27015.
You enter an office building and escort the first 4 tie wearing people you see out.
You get pulled over by the cops and you look over at your friend and say, "CT's win again"
You wont go into a smoky bar because your afraid it will ruin you're frame rate.
You do a full defrag before every clan match.
You go through 5 keyboards a year.
you play 20 hours a day, 18 for practice and 2 just for fun.
You carry you're keyboard mouse and mousepad along with you in a backpack, should you ever be challenged and forced to play on an unfamilliar machine.
You regularly regurgitate the phrases "Awp Whore!", "Noob Sticking ass Wipe!", and "Drop The Shield Cheap Newbie!"
You are superior to all other gamers... because you are my friend you are a CS guru and I salute you.
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