it actually fucks up your game when you jump over obstacles or if you do that bugged sliding thing, fps has literally nothing to do with falling distance
Except that's wrong. Your frame rate does affect a ton of shit, including jumping, falling distance, falling speed, and climbing. That's why you can survive a massive fall without damage and/or die to the most insignificant one. That's why you swim faster at a lower frame rate, or why you die when you climb a ledge at a higher frame rate. I'm not sure where you got your information but it's misleading.
1:58, for example.