I am feeling nothing but irony when writing this to be completely honest. This has to be like what, third time in total that I write something like tihs on this specific section of Argonath?
I once said that people often tend to loose brain cells upon leaving VCPD, and time after time has proven that this claim of mine was true. So true, in fact, that it seemed to have happened to me after I resigned from VCPD as well.
I've no idea what it is, what is it that makes people act so ridiculously irrational when leaving the PD, but as if it was a law of physics - it keeps happening. I always thought this would never happen to me, but it did. Ever since I have resigned from ARPD, I've started numerous of fights with the VCMP admin team and other members of the server. I started to irrationally think that for some odd reason I was being mistreated. Was it my pride, perhaps: very possible I felt that my achievements as the head of VCPD were being dismissed and I was not being given enough tribute for them, though, obviously, I see how stupid that is now.
Another reason I can think of, and a very likely one, is stress. This isn't the first time I'd be telling people that stress and me don't go well together. Around the time I was leaving the VCPD, I was under constant state of stress. My timetable has shifted radically and it seemed that I couldn't manage my time anymore. Exams, studies, work and everything was getting under my skin, and I've been starting to feel extremely uneasy. When people are uneasy, they can act irrational, and I did.
So what is this all about? I am not quite sure to be frank. I was just having my morning cup of tea and suddenly thought about Argonath. At this point in time, I am mid-exam session, I already have taken the most difficult exams, now have a vacant week and then will have two more exams the next one. I was kind of thinking what to do to kill time and thought about Argonath, and reflected on my actions, I guess. I just thought that I might have attacked some people unfairly and acted childlishly. Something that would be completely unacceptable of me and the position I used to hold. I thought it would be fair to apologize to everyone who had to put up with my tantrums before I left Argonath.
Ofcourse, I might have selfish reasons behind that too. I haven't ruled out returning to VCMP, or hell, even VCPD, if I ever feel welcome here again. I mean, I am about to have an entire month of holidays and I will have to figure out what to do with all that time on my hands.
On an extra note - how have you been? I've been intending to hop in for a while but the server's been rather empty.
Meeses, please don't respond to this topic. I honestly, genuinly and with all my heart still give completely zero shits about what you have to say.
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