Maybe its goodbye

[CBFasi]

Some of you have not really caught on to why I can get so hurt by comments about a game..

Yes its a game but its REAL people who play it.

The RL job I do has no recognition for what it does, ins fact its amusing watching the news and seeing the end product as headlines and knowing that nobody knows who was involved.  But hey thats RL..

I joined this server with major problems, and this server allowed me to stop focusing on problems, and helped get me off medication and back to normality.

I tok on the role as scripter, and admin cos I thought I could help, and I still can, but what got to me ws all that time and effort is being criticised.  I dont need the 'you've done a great job etc' but I also dont need this sucks etc, its the latter type that hurts so much.  I am happiest when I see others enjoying themselves, hence when things are working I can just sit back and be relaxed cos I made a positive impact.

I am in my 30's and all I can give I am giving, whats is wrong with someone trying their best to help others have a bit of fun.

Yes I am serious about what I do, Ihave to be cos if I was not I woudl not give a shit and you cant work with attitude as both higher level admin and lead scripter.

If this game had no player invovlement then yep I would be really sad but fact is we have an international community that benefits from the work of others, both admins and scritpers and seem to just moan yet come back so something right... we dont have politcal or sexist devides or anyof thos other RL isssues, we dont care who or what you are, all we ask is you play within our rules and have fun.

Yes I now have a temper issue, but a kick is often a good release and thankfully does no real harm to players.  I will try to reduce and be more fair about this.  That temper wasnt there a few motnhs ago, so think why its got worse.

I cannot go back, I wish I could, all we can do is go forward, learn from mistakes and thats what I try to infer over to others.

Trust, and Honesty, 2 areas I hold true, or at least try to, you got a problem with that, then look at yourself.
Someone comes to me with a problem, do not forget I will look at the whole picture, I will avoid taking sides and if I feel I cannot make a decision fairly I will get others involved.

If you acuse me of taking sides, look carefully about what I am saying, look at whole problem from the other side and see just what I am doing.

[Nexxt]

Very, very nice words CBFasi.
It's good you post your feelings about this situation and make this public to everyone who want to read it.
I hope people will see your trying to let others have fun, atleast so do I.

And yes, I also know that you are open for anyone who has troubles.
So I also told you a bit of my problems and you tried to help me with a neutral fair advice.
I am still happy you gave that to me.

And we read from your post, you also dont have the best life as you could imagine.
But as you are much on teamspeak, and we 'guys of teamspeak' (They know theirself who they are , like Pancher, David, Me ..etc.) will be always have a listening ear on TS when you want to tell something.

Like yesterday, the things you will said will not be told here...But we tried to help you, with listening to your story about what are your feelings on the current issue, and we did that in the best way we could try.

I am happy to see that you are not left yet, and also dont want to left yourself.
Because atleast I, even not when I exactly know how it is to be a DEV, try to understand the hard parts in it.
And also, I do really understand the hard parts in real life, as I am for around 4 years now.

I hope everything will go well on one time, and that you can play the game relaxed and have fun.

[Pandalink]

And yet again, who gave you the right to delete our posts without even telling us you did so? That's stupid...

I imagine he deleted them because I reported your post, and came to a decision that it was totally unnecessary.
Legend, stop trying to provoke me. It isn't going to work anymore, you aren't going to make me get angry and get banned like you want me to be, so please stop trying to do that. I've realised my problem on here, and I am not going to respond to your post in anger like you want.
Since you just quoted your post back again, I have reported it, again.

I think my post was something along the lines of:
"Why would you say that, I haven't done that whatsoever. I've seen what I did wrong and apologised."


CB, about the kick, I understand as sometimes I see others get annoyed or frustrated, and certainly I do myself at times also. I hope you see how much I do appreciate your work, and I understand that I haven't shown it as much as I should have. I know I've made mistakes, and I hope I can earn back your trust and respect over time, since I value them both very much.

[itsonlyaname]

All I can say after reading this is don't leave.

[Eugene]

Here is what I think...

If you think that it would be best for you to leave argonath and all this online gaming communiti thang. then do it!
Real life comes first! specialy when you are a cop IRL, u need to stay focus on ur job when u are putting ur life on the line., and not think about those online games...


(btw im planning to be a police officer too. I have one more year in high school, then hopefully im going to take some police academy, or take some law studying in college )

[Indica]

CBFasi, you're a great person for putting this whole server together. I would be quite upset if you left, but that's your choice. Thank you, honestly, for the scripts to RS4. You've given me something to do in my spare time after my school/schoolwork is done, and something to do on weekends.
This server is great, not only because of the community and the commands, but the administration as well. CBFasi, you're one of the greatest admins I've ever encountered on a game.
Good luck, man. If you decide to leave, that's your choice, but know we'll miss you. A lot.
Thanks,
Indica Amanita (Alex)

[Vince]

The guys from TS, you know who you are, big thanks for listening, you know far more about me than many ever will, keep that confidential please, it helped to talk and explain why I am like I am, and why certain activities are really really bad moves with me

I will stay, Smeagol will stay until I am settled again, then CBFasi will likely return.

Anytime, just remember we're, just as well as many MANY other people are and will always be here for you. Just don't think you're alone because you're not, we got your back.  It's safe with me.

[Cane]

The guys from TS, you know who you are, big thanks for listening, you know far more about me than many ever will, keep that confidential please, it helped to talk and explain why I am like I am, and why certain activities are really really bad moves with me

We got your back. 

[Nexxt]

Here is what I think...

If you think that it would be best for you to leave argonath and all this online gaming communiti thang. then do it!
Real life comes first! specialy when you are a cop IRL, u need to stay focus on ur job when u are putting ur life on the line., and not think about those online games...


(btw im planning to be a police officer too. I have one more year in high school, then hopefully im going to take some police academy, or take some law studying in college )

Fail, I dont think CBFasi is a cop in real life.
...

[MikeUK]

Fail, I dont think CBFasi is a cop in real life.
...

I think he is at the MOD. Not the police.

O-Dogg - Fail.

[CBFasi]

Actually not even MOD, but MOD is a customer of mine, along with the British Army, the Police Forces, and other nations..

What I do hoever is directly related to law enforcement, but not the low level stuff, but the big stuff that thankfully you dont hear too much about due to our success.  (Our view, if the public does not know what we stopped, then they can carry on without the fear of what we stopped.. but try telling the press that! )

Another fact... the organistation I work for is that critical we are NOT allowed to strike and can be dismissed instantly if we do..

I am staying but I shall likely be doing what I need to do and that is delegate work out to those I believe capable of carrying out that work.

[Kitsune]

What is MOD?

Anyway, I'm glad you decided to stay CBFASI. Keep in mind that the vast majority of us have a lot of respect for you and really appreciate the work that you're doing.

[Malcolm]

You don't work for MI6 do you? :o

Nonetheless I too am glad you decided to stay.

[MikeUK]

What is MOD?

Ministry of Defence.
website: mod.uk

[Cofiliano]

You don't work for MI6 do you? :o

You took the sentence from my mouth..

Like O-Dog sayed, RL is far more important, especialy if you are over 16/17+ years old. I personaly got adicted to Argonath, so i can forget for few hours of playing, abaut my RL problems and pressure.. But it went to far as well, so i made a break of allmost 2 weeks from PC ( i even took out my hard drive and give it to trust person to hold it for me ), before SAMP i didnt play games or any PC stuff for like 4-5 years, i done more important stuff in my life, but as whell as CBF, i took SAMP as a pressure release of RL prob/pressure. Now you are facing that all your hard work and time that you spent in your ``pressure release``, is taking atack by some inmature person, and you wake up, and find out, that all the pressure you have RL, have just made up in Argonath too...
If me, as a Mafia leader, one of the best mafia on Server, is having this much pressure , i can only imagine, how much shit you had in the last few months..

I can only sugest to you, take a break few days/weeks, come back see is it possible to continue in the way you want it, if not, quit playing, its the best thing you can do for YOURSELF, your state of mind, and your personal life.