Them mods are reportin' our IP's to dah FBI!!!1111
Piracy - If I were to get caught for the amount of times I did it, I'd either be in community service until I'm 20 or be fined thousands or even tens of thousands of dollars (including the payments to the companies I pirated).
Shoplifting - Milkshake... DELICIOUS THOUGH - I got caught ONCE, but I remedied it by paying for the milkshake. I haven't returned to the shop I shoplifted since.
Jaywalking
Public Indecency - I had to go and there wasn't a tree for miles...
Curfew violation - My state's curfew is absolutely retarded anyway...10:00PM - Fuck that shit.
Removed the tag from my mattress - I'M SO BADASS
Piracy - I did it again
Trespassing - I didn't see the "NO TRESPASSING" sign until after I left the private property. It was facing the wrong way.
Trespassing - I DID IT AGAIN
Trespassing - What? I was hungry.
Trespassing - I liked the shade
Trespassing - My fucktard friend threw a whole bag of cans over the side of a barbed wire fence. I went and got them because I can. Whoever made that barbed wire fence is retarded, because I could easily fit my feet and ass in between each barb.
Trespassing - I needed privacy...
Trespassing - C'mon man, it was a shortcut to Farm Fresh
Trespassing - I needed some corn.
Stealing - Speaking of corn...
Trespassing - I entered the girl's bathroom.
Trespassing - I was at the neighborhood park after nightfall.
Trespassing - I like to hang out in forests...especially when some asshole ever-so conveniently claims it as private property.
Trespassing - Girl's bathroom again
Trespassing - God, all I wanted was a potato.
It's easy to get away with crime. The best part about it is not knowing it's a crime while doing it at first, but realizing it afterwards, and saying "I'm one lucky mother fucker."
Surprisingly, my criminal record is clean.
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